It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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