For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Randomize
