Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize