is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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