Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
