Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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