Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
