Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
