The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
