Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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