Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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