I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
