i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I pour the whiskey from now on
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
All I want is dick and wine.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
