just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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