Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Randomize
