I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
