so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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