ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
