like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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