so explain again why im purple
no
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Randomize