I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
All the doctor said was why
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
