god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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