Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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