yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
