just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize