But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
