Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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