I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
