yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
