party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Green mimosas i think yes
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Randomize
