please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
