i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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