Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
