i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize