Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
