if you like me you must not know who I am
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
As shirtless as possible
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
