weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
