Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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