Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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