Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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