What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Randomize
