I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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