So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize