Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Randomize
