are you still at the devil's house?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
