So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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