Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I think I won the penis lottery.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
