In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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