How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
