he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize