Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
